The Inner Winner: Intrinsic Core Values Are The Most Important Human Quality by Denis Waitley

The Inner Winner: Intrinsic Core Values Are The Most Important Human Quality by Denis Waitley

Healthy self-esteem is perhaps the most important and basic quality of a winning human being. You want to be able to say, “I like myself. Given my parents and my background, I’m glad I’m me. I realize I may not be the best-looking in the group, but I always look my best in every group. I’d rather be me than anyone else in the world.” This is the self-talk of a winner. Winners have developed a strong sense of self-worth, regardless of their status. They weren’t necessarily born with these good feelings, but they’ve learned to like themselves through practice.

The most successful companies in the world know that valued employees are their most precious resource. Valuable employees pass their value on to customers. The result? Excellence. Quality. The most powerful competitors in the world marketplace. Instead of comparing ourselves to others, we should view ourselves in terms of our own abilities, interests, and goals. We can begin by making a conscious effort to upgrade our lifestyle, education, and personal development. You always project on the outside how you feel on the inside.

Self-acceptance, as we are right now, is the key to healthy self-esteem—seeing ourselves as worthwhile, changing, imperfect, growing individuals, and knowing that although we aren’t born with equal mental and physical uniforms, we are born with the equal right to feel deserving of excellence according to our own internal standards. A healthy challenge is to accept ourselves right now as changing, growing, imperfect works of art and also form an image or dream of who we are becoming. This future projection is in no way designed to detract from the magnificence and beauty of who we are now. It gives us direction and inspiration to become more of who we really are.

Core values radiate like rings, as when a leaf falls in a pond. The self-centered constantly seek approval from and power over others. They try to impress them with their worth rather than express concern for others’ well-being. And their outward appearances usually involve ways to hide their real thoughts and intentions. There is a paradoxical proverb here: You must feel worthy of the best, but not more worthy than the rest. In other words, you were born with every right to experience success, but being your best doesn’t mean that you are superior to others.

The value-centered give of themselves freely and graciously, constantly seeking to empower others. Open and modest, they have no need for conceit, the opposite of core value. Feeling good about who they are, and not needing to constantly talk about their victories or line their walls with associations with celebrities or their awards, people with core values spend much of their time “paying value” to others, a concept you’ll learn more about throughout this book.

When praised, they accept the value paid and share the spotlight. When they make mistakes, they view them as learning experiences and accept responsibility.

Self-esteem can’t be bought, won in an arena, measured by a stock portfolio, or displayed in a fashion model’s figure or an entertainment star’s profile. Self-esteem is a profound belief that you deserve to be happy and successful. It is as necessary for human development as oxygen, as basic as the carbon from which diamonds are formed. I used to think that diamonds were so sought after because of their glittering appearance as a status symbol but discovered that they’re actually so valuable because they’re almost impossible to destroy. Formed at the earth’s core and very rare, they hold their value indefinitely.

The simple truth is that if you have no internalized feelings of value, you have nothing to share with others. You can need them, depend on them, look for security in them—but you can’t share or give feelings of love and value to anyone else unless you possess these feelings yourself. The diamond is inside, as an uncut gemstone of priceless potential, waiting to be mined, shaped, and polished. You are the star in your own universe, and, with the help of this book, you are about to discover the essence of your unique journey toward personal enrichment.

Back to blog

Leave a comment

Please note, comments need to be approved before they are published.